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Tuesday, February 14, 2012

The CRAZY Day!

ElastaWoman and Kind Sock Fashion Expert watched the kids so Eyes could help us with the house inspection.

Was my purse here?

Dinner out after the inspection

Archer photographed these elk on the way home one day.....

Last week in town was C-R-A-Z-Y! In a crazy effort to utilize our Healthy MT Kids insurance before we move, coupled by saving on gas, I had 6 appts scheduled - 3 dentist, 1 Dr, 1 music and 1 vet. Super Catman's hand hadn't been right since his sledding mishap on the wall of ice, so that was all part of the grand scheme of things. Along with all the hoopla, a nice girl wanted my baby crib which I had to arrange for and I decided to finally get rid of the broken easy chair which was propped against the wall because the back no longer stayed up. All of this "over scheduling" was bound for trouble, but I didn't see it coming.
That morning, I began coordinating things via facebook, feeling a bit too proud about my level of organization. Then the dentist called in sick, so I rescheduled Dr. appt time. Then I had to change the crib intercept time. Soon, I realized that The Archer had my cell phone. This would make things even a bit more complicated. Just when we were about to leave, I saw a fresh dog doodoo in the yard. HOORAY! I was supposed to bring in a fresh sample to be tested for worms. Eagerly, I went outside to scoop the evidence into a yogurt container. I had worried that I was going to have to stop on the side of the road and pick up yesterdays from when we went running together.
Somehow children and dog and broken chair and God knows what else were loaded into a pickup truck and began the slow descent over the pass into town. "Moona is kicking the dog!" "I am not!" bickering went on, but I was deep in contemplation of pulling off my flawless trip.
All of this planning would change when, at the first appt, the Dr. decided to send us over to the hospital to get an Xray of Super Catman's superior hybrid claw-paw-hand. Didn't they know he is part cat after all? Apparently not. Thankfully Our Sock Fashion Expert had met with the crib lady in the parking lot of the clinic and done the deal already. Miss Libby was whining. After the xray, we were dropping off another item at the consignment store. Thankfully the consignment store lady let me make some calls. Did I mention The Earnest Money came back and I had to clear that up? After a series of calls at the consignment store, I was again, organized, though my pride in the day a bit tainted.
Next we decided to go to the grocery store. There were no parking spots. People were acting crazy. There weren't even any carts! It was the 18 hour cereal sale. With my "superior planning", I sat the kids down at a corner in the deli with a broaster chicken and began braving the mob to get my share of cereal and sale items. Again, flawlessly, I pulled in to the "15 items or less" line with 15 items. Boy was I good ;-)
My big mistake was made when I returned to the kids and saw there was still some chicken left. I sat down, relaxed and ate for a few moments. Then it was back to the grindstone and we were navigating our way out the door amongst deranged looking shoppers. One large man was angry that he could not find any Captain Crunch and was snidely accusing the checker of buying it all before he could get there. I breathed a sigh of relief. I was glad to get out of this crazy place. If we headed straight to the dump, we could make it just in time for Sock Fashion Experts music lesson.
The Sock Fashion Expert gawked at and photographed all the ravens in the dump. The smell and mud mixed with trash made us almost want to drive away with the chair. Finally, I told her I would push it out without her help and I did. It wasn't until we were at the music lesson that I started looking around for the number the clinic had given me to call to check on Super Catman's hand. It was no where. NEITHER WAS MY PURSE!! Panic began to rise inside of me and I began losing my ability to rationalize. It was either in the mud at the dump or WITH THE CRAZY GROCERY STORE MOB!! How could this have happened to my perfectly planned day?!? The teacher wasn't there yet, but I left my beautiful daughter on the porch with her guitar and headed in the direction of the grocery store. I was trying not to drive like a maniac, but the impulse was alive and well.
There is this "new rule" with all house loans today. You have to some how "legally" have all the down payment in your bank account. Even if you have saved your money at home as cash, it is considered "dirty". No money is accepted unless proven beyond a shadow of a doubt. It is the most insane rule I have ever heard of. We can't sell anything to a family member, and if we do sell anything, we have to prove when we bought it. Even if you get your pay check, take cash out and put it back in the next day, the money is "dirty". Amongst my day, my head never stopped contemplating how we could "prove" our down payment and how we could come up with it all. Every dollar is scrutinized. My husband had given me strict rules to "stop thinking about it" but it was hard not to. The rules were so crazy it was near impossible. It is actually set up so that you almost have to find some way to launder legally gained money even though its an "anti laundering" rule. UGH! Anyhow, fear overtook me. What if all the money we finally proved was "legal" was taken with one swipe of a card? What if my stupidity caused us to lose the house? Oh the agony! I prayed and tried to picture all the good people who would do what I would do and turn the purse in. I couldn't even call the store because I didn't have my cell phone.
After a most difficult and incredibly hard to drive the speed limit trip across town, I parked the kids in handicap parking and locked the door mid run. I fit right in with the crazy mob running into the store with a wild eyed look. There was the chair which I hung my purse on. It was gone. Was it at the dump in the mud? Did I chose the wrong place to go? I rushed up to the counter with a constipated expression. The lady pointed me to customer service assuring me she'd brought my purse there. Thank God for good people! At customer service, the man was reluctant to come see me. He might have thought I was going to demand more Captain Crunch, but after I explained my crazy wild eyed look, he gave me my purse....... all the money and credit cards intact. Selah.
I was very relieved as I left the store and hoped no handicapped person had been slighted. When I got to the music lesson, I intruded to use the phone. The nurse told me my son's hand was indeed, broken and it needed to be put in a cast. The only time was during the vet time, so then I had to call them. In the end, they agreed I could hang the poop on the door if I couldn't make it in time (not the clinic, the vet). You know people are good when they let you hand poop on their door. After the cast, we made it to the vet. My first poop sample contained a large rubber band which I had mistaken for a worm. The second sample contained no worms. The vet eyed me skeptically. "Really, I saw them crawling right out of her poop" I groaned. Reluctantly, he gave me more wormer "just in case". "Next time bring me the worms" he said smiling. Over all, by the time all was said and done, I was feeling very very humble and thankful. No more was I a master organizer of time, but a girl fallen on the mercy of God just to make it through the day.
I won't go on any more for fear that your head will explode with all of this information, as I felt mine would by the end of the day. Sufficient to say, the day ended and my sister was kind enough to listen to my debriefing over the phone with a cup of tea.
I never did tell my dear husband all of the story. I just couldn't bear to confess it and burden him with it. Today is valentines day and there is again tulips and roses gracing my table. I couldn't stop crying when he gave them to me. Life is crazy, but some things God just ordains. Some things are constant. We all may fail sometimes, but we can trust that God in us never does.


Mamma has spoken said...

So glad you found the purse! That is one scary problem. Fingers crossed that all goes well and you close on your new house soon!

Amber said...

Glad you found your purse, and very glad there are a few honest people left.
Sounds like one crazy day for most, but after reading your blog for awhile now it sounds pretty normal.
Don't ya love those chaotic days! We have them quite often.
Best part is when (days/weeks later) you can look back and laugh at those days.

Hope your sons hand heals well!

Heather said...

Glad you survived your crazy day--I enjoyed talking with you on the phone that evening.

Still waiting about our house, but there's some news--let's talk soon!

Love you!

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