YAAK Adventures: Girls with Guns Don't Always Shoot Big Bucks (from Nov 2015)

Hunting with My Husband Last Day of the Season

I decided I was long overdue for a new blog post. I smiled as I heard Miss Moonbeam playing in the bath tub. She'd accepted the bathwater bribe and I had a good half hour or more of peace. The boys were outside doing I don't know what, but probably best left ignorant because right now I am writing and not shouting about at them.

Hunting season came and went in a blur, but seemed a bit of an agony. Day after day, I carefully planned out my wardrobe. At all times, I tried to keep track of my favorite and lucky "Girls With Guns" long sleever which mostly seemed to be in the laundry or lost. Far back in the reasonings of my mind, I had this permanent vision of posing with a monstrous buck wearing it. Of course I would be featured on the "Girls With Guns" blog. Why this was the cornerstone of planning my hunt, I do not know. I just couldn't seem to get the idea out of my head. As hunt after hunt progressed, it became more apparent that getting a photo worthy buck was going to be more difficult than just "doing my time". That and I depended more heavily on the "Woolrich" wool sweater I'd found for $4 at a thrift store. Day after day, I trudged wearily through the snow, drove miles and agonized at missed shots when my monster seemed to always elude me. My very patient husband was present for many of these long days. Even Art Dog went out with me once. To no avail, my timing seemed impeccabale for missing them altogether.

Meanwhile a heated competition emerged between Catman and Elastawoman's eldest daughter, last known as "chicks who try to drown people". She's grown up into a beautiful young lady now, so I'm renaming her LynnA . LynnA passed up bucks left and right because she would not be outshot by Catman. Of course Catman was doing the very same thing. Catman DID NOT want to be out shot by a girl!! Art Dog was taking Catman out almost daily and he wasn't getting much either because he spent all of his time helping Catman locate bucks.

ArtDog totalled his 4-Runner on icy roads this year, thank God he walked away from it. He borrowed a "Yaak Truck" that is to say, one not totally roadworthy of going to town, my husband's black beast. For some reason, wherever they went, they seemed to terrorize out of state hunters. This was completely unintentional on their part, but after a while, because of all the strange predicaments they found themselves in, we just laughed. On one occasion, ArtDog pulled up behind a Washington hunting rig. A dejected out of stater marched toward them with shoulders slumped, dragging his feet along. He was mourning the fact that he'd somehow lost a spike that he shot at. On and on as he bellowed, the boys watched a 4x4 buck prance along behind him. The man never turned around and the boys kept a stiff upper lip. After the man drove away, ArtDog mouthed to Catman "SHOOT!!" Catman took the shot and missed.........twice. He was sure his gun was not sighted in right ;-) All in all Catman did bag a nice 3x3. Embarrassingly, the last week of the season, I took a forked horn that LynnA passed up. I had no camera and didn't want pictures anyway, consequently, I was wearing my girls with guns shirt. Artdog got a decent 4x4 which he had to bone out up high, so he never got any pictures. The idea of us posing together with heads seems kind of barbaric and I just haven't brought myself to doing it.

The day before the last day of the season, my dear husband had a rare day where he got to go out by himself. He had pushed back shop work and took off for well deserved day of hunt. I went over to Mist's for her little boy's birthday party. While I was there, LynnA announced to me that she'd seen him on the road with a big 5x7!! I scarfed down her amazing lemon cake and rushed home to find the monstrous brute in the back of his truck. Oh happy day!! After the long season without much harvesting, the last week seemed to find us all with some horns and meat to process.

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Thanksgiving was another story altogether. I had to work a long 12 hr night shift that night before the big day. My husband had sent me in over an hour early on running errands for him. I wondered how I would manage through all the hoopla in a state of zombie like awareness. Emergency Departments are always emotionally taxing this time of the year, and many of the saddest cases I'ved worked happened over the holidays. In preparation for this emotional upset, I purchased bags of chips from a discount store, a case of candy bars, and a large container of Crappy Deli Chineese Food. Actually the candy bars and chips were for hunting snacks, but I figured it wouldn't hurt to be well prepared. Miss Belly Fat cackled with joy and anticipation of packing on extra fluff. I worried that I was giving her too much leway, but comfort food is comfort food - right?! Several slices of pumpkin pie and whipped cream awaited me there at work. By the time I'd gotten off of my shift, I thought that perhaps I would just roll out the door.

That morning Gracie, her husband, boys and parents all met me at the Turkey Trot. We ran like the wind, and I hoped that the breaking wind behind us would not catch up. Her family was all very proud of her and extremely supportive. It was a lot of fun running with her, and the one thing I could be proud of doing that day.

We arrived at a very somber Thanksgiving Dinner that night. Things hadn't gone well and everybody was sad and teary. People we were excited to see weren't there. I didn't know how to make things better, and I'd entered Zombie mode anyway. After stuffing myself full of jalapeno poppers and turkey, I settled into what probably resembled a low budget movie of what "Zomies At Thanksgiving Dinner" would look like. Mostly I laid on the floor and groaned out occasional replies to the dull conversation. More friends arrived, though I can't recall what exactly we talked about..........