Butter Knife in the Toilet and the Big City (Part 1)

On a rather dark and gloomy morning, much earlier than any of us are accustomed to arising, we embarked on our grand adventure. My husband had business in the big city far away and shockingly, he'd been persuaded to take us all along. On many of his business trips, he's only taken an older boy or two. This was the first time in a long time he decided to take a big chance and let us all chum along. The likelihood of us not getting into some kind of crazy mix up in the big city was slim, indeed, though I did not remind him of this disclosure.
I should of taken it as an omen when I checked my sprouts that the trip would be rather, er... colorful. They (my sprouts) hadn't done much in the past few days, surprising. I would have thought by now they'd begun to grow. I rinsed them and shook the jar just like I had for the past several days. Tiny brown particles again leaked out. "Gosh", I wondered to myself, "Something seems to be wrong with these little guys. They keep slipping through the mesh." It was then that I checked the package of sprouting seeds I'd been using and discovered it was loose bulk Chai tea!! My daughter eyed me skeptically as I rinsed the remainder down the sink.
As we ate our breakfast, I reminded the kids for the tenth time they'd have to all work together to do the dishes before we left. Mass chaos erupted in kitchen as they all worked somewhat "together". Art dog had been elected to dump some yucky water from a soaking dish out. Since the door was froze shut, he headed to the toilet. As he dumped the water out, he started yelling. Another argument erupted in the kitchen and the kids informed me that a butter knife had been dumped in the toilet along with the dirty water. I told Art Dog "you'll just have to get it out". Art Dog looked at me dumbfounded.
If you know Art Dog, you'll know that he entertains certain, err, fetishes. One of them being with germs. This kid of mine places his toothbrush in many unusual places to keep it clean. I have found it stuck in his top bunk. It's been over the top of the bathroom door on the tiny molding ledge. It's been rubber banded to the towel bar. I find it all different places depending on how hard he has used his imagination. This is the kid who refused to take a bite of his sisters candy bar. She even offered to let him bite from the other end. He told her "you have no idea how fast germs travel." The idea of getting a butter knife out of a toilet could be likened to a living sci fi in his mind. Finally I arranged for him to borrow some rubber gloves and he did the terrible deed. Of course the kid washing the dishes didn't want to wash that. Another argument erputed. In the end, I let him throw the butter knife in the trash. This was taking up too much time and energy when we were already behind schedule. All the way to town, we told stories about mutant butter knives. It was somewhat entertaining. But this was only the beginning of a very long weekend..........................