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Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Desiderata



The other day, as we made our way down the single lane drive over the mountain pass to get to town, my husband and I began reminiscing over parts of life we have lived. Just a few years ago, we were operating a growing business. Employees, subcontractors and friends filled up every day to overflowing. Business seemed to be booming and we seemed to hold an air of popularity with folks all around. It was almost as if friends came out of the woodwork. Then, when we had a few years that the company didn't do as well, the friends dissipated just like fluffy snow on an extra hot day. All that was left was mud puddles in place of friendships. We kind of snickered about the shallowness of people who we thought were really our friends. We thanked God for the lull in business because it brought us to a greater place of depth. As a young couple in our mid 20's the money had come fast, as did the friends. We had some maturing that needed to take place. Had the money stayed, we may never have discovered the arrogance that began to creep in.
As we continued, we passed "Caribou Gulch", a notorious spot where there are no guard rails and a steep drop off. There is water wayyyyyyyyy down there and some times you can see Moose and other wildlife. It is undoubtedly the scariest part of the whole trip. The snow doesn't bank well there and often there is ice on the single lane. Meeting a car or truck there is something everybody hopes doesn't happen to them.
We continued our discussion. Just this past month, we had observed relatives interacting with each other and saw something chilling. For us, we'd known the hurt of being taken advantage of by friendships with ulterior motives. For others, their own family members readily used them. Sadly, there was too much pride for the person to see it. Money and fame tends to make a person think a little too highly of themselves. That's where the treachery comes in. Full of pride, they are blind to the fact they are being taken advantage of. Sometimes its a need to feel loved or show love that causes this dysfunction. That can happen with weight loss too. I have lots of bloggie buddies now, who are excited to be seeing new bodies. Remember that your spouse was faithful to stay with you when you were much heavier next time somebody checks you out.
Consistency in friendships, family and business all need to be found. Everybody needs a degree of Independence. We must all learn to be functional outside of our parents, friends and co-workers. Taking too much is wrong as is giving too much at times. For us, shallow friendships have been replaced with deeper ones. A little bit of grey, a few wrinkles and a much healthier perspective of ourselves than there was once before. Also, we have the hope of the future. A hope that our children will grow up to be good people. Ones who don't mooch and ones who aren't leaned on in an unhealthy way. I am hoping to instill healthy eating and exercise traits in them so that they won't have to go where I've been before. There is the hope that our business will once again thrive along with the caution that we will know better how to manage money and friendships. And last, there is the patience in knowing that in time all things will happen. Character is a good thing to focus on along the way.
Mark 8:36 For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? 37 Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul?

5 comments:

Sal said...

You've given me a lot to think about in this post. Thanks.

cmoursler said...

Amen.
I remember that as I get smaller and there are guys who are looking...that they never looked before. They never saw me until I 'looked' better.
My husband saw me all along.
that is priceless.
Great post.

toytrkman said...

Sometimes, the things that seem so bad at the moment can be some of the best things that can happen to a person. Also, it comes down to a choice. Are you going to let the Lord make this seemingly bad situation into something beneficial, or are you going to wallow in the muck of self pity instead? Sometimes we can be blind to the fact that our position in life that seems so good really isn't all that great. The Lord often times has something so much better but we are too reluctant to take it. So when the life that we thought was so great falls apart, in His love and mercy he turns it into something glorious if we will let Him. Fear of change often times keeps people from being the best they can be.

baili said...

hello hard times in life explore the real face of it,i saw my very close relatives changing when they just jumped to the high states of life and it took quite time to believe it cause in their hard times i was all along,you know these are the memories which deliver the pain to my heart so deep but that time made us realize that how much we love each other and me and my husband grateful to god for test,take care

Becky said...

I like what toytrkman has said, I really need to hear that right now in my situation.