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Friday, February 20, 2009

PMS

As many of you are well aware, My friend, Silver bell and I started a weight loss group that eventually became an accountability group. At the beginning, not many people showed interest. At our first meeting, one other lady showed up who really wasn't interested in losing weight, but wanted to visit. We later embraced Hazel, whose only obious falt is a perfect figure. Depite this obious, falt, we embraced her into our ranks. With the addition of Hazel, came a new found stability and hunger for more of God. Despite Hazels terrible fault, she is really well grounded in Christ and adds a wonderful flavor to our meetings. We now have another friend, whom I have deemed "Mist". Mist is a very sweet girl whose only obious faults are not only a perfect figure, but a good attitude as well. She smiles a lot, doesn't complain and the worst thing which I have saved for last is that she is a pretty blonde.
The trouble all started when I showed up at work last week. It began my "funk" if you will. A dizzy, blonde nurse walked up to me in the report room. She looked at me and cocked her head. Then she grabbed an appendage on my body shaking her head sadly. She said the word that every woman has grown to fear. Its a word that I almost didn't want to mention, but for the thrill of the story I will tell you if you promise not to gasp and examine my prior photos. This word sent me on a "funk" for a week and may have induced PMS that I am now experiencing. The word was, (dare i say it?!) ....... Clairol. Yes, she grabbed my hair and after examining it said nothing but "Clairol" and then walked away sadly. Needless to say my shift did not go well. Every time I entered a patients room, I had to stop and examine my hair in the mirrors. Patients began to wonder what I was doing. Every time somebody looked up at me, I saw that woman chanting the evil "Clairol" chant and laughing fiendishly in my head. My funk was in full swing.
Silver bell awoke from a deep slumber. She lives in a beautiful log home on a crystal river. She has 2 children who she ushered off to school. She showered, fixed her hair special and commensed to clean her home up. After working all morning to prepare for our "Accountability Group", Silver bell looked at her clock. Ten o'clock came and went with her wondering where we all were. After Ten fifteen and finally ten thirty, she decided we all must be mad at her for cancelling on us last week. She sat down on the couch feeling her own funk come on. It was not until much later that she discovered it was Wednesday and not Thursday, the day our meeting was actually scheduled for.
When I showed up on Thursday at accountability meeting "Clairol" was still screaming at me. The nurse had now become an evil villian cackling inside of my head. I felt as if every one must be thinking that I am much too old and grey to be a part of this group. Completely rediculous thoughts plagued my mind. What I didn't understand was that completely rediculous thoughts plague most womens minds much of the time. Now I am not saying that we are all rediculous. I am saying that we believe rediculous lies that happen to show up inside of our brains if we are not careful. PMS is part of the evil villain who may disguise himself as a fiendish nurse inside of your brain.
I complemented Silver bell on her hair do. Little did I know that she was thinking "I haven't even fixed my hair today!" We went on with the meeting and before long we were all chums and having a good "get in touch with your feelings" and "God" type meeting. We laughed, we cried, we ate some home made lasanga and we prayed together after reading from "The Prayer of Jabez" book.
Later as Silver bell and I were comparing notes, we discovered the plot of the fiendish nurse in my head. Actually, she had no idea. It was more my own personal discovery. I was thinking that since I shared this verse with other people that day maybe it applied to me. Here it is :

2 Corinthians 10:4-6 (King James Version)

4(For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;)

5Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;

6And having in a readiness to revenge all disobedience, when your obedience is fulfilled.

1 comment:

Jujita said...

What a wonderful story. I've SO been there! Isn't it easy to focus on the negative?